Book Review: Leadership and Self-Deception

Pastor Nathan bought this book for our entire youth staff after he read it. It was recommended to him by our senior pastor. The title definitely grabbed my attention – I’m getting tired of reading leadership book after leadership book about the same things. The book did not disappoint!


This book focuses on how everyone is affected by the way we treat them. We often deceive ourselves into thinking everyone around us are causing problems, not working hard enough, have bad attitudes, etc., but we never recognize that it’s the way we treat people affects the way they work, how successful our business is, their attitude around us, and so much more. I’d would say this a must read – I definitely gained a lot of insight from it. Here are some of my favorite takeaways – hope they interest you:

  • Self-Deception is the inability to see that one has a problem
  • We can tell how other people feel about us, and it’s to that we respond
  • No matter what we’re doing on the outside, people respond primarily to how we’re feeling about them on the inside
  • Either I’m seeing others straightforwardly as they are – as people like me who have needs and desires as legitimate as my own – or I’m not
  • When I blame others, I’m not doing it because they need to improve, I’m blaming them because their shortcomings justify my failure. . .  People who came together to help and org. succeed actually end up delighting in each others failures and resenting each others success.
  • Are you seeing people as people or as objects?
  • The  moment I see another as a person with needs, hopes, worries as real and legitimate as my own – I’m out of the box
  • At work you can’t focus on results if your focused on yourself
  • Success as a leader depends on being free of self-betrayal.
  • Don’t worry whether others are helping you. Do worry whether you are helping others.

Final Grade: A    Buy it here


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